For the last couple of months, I’ve been battling with depression and it’s been horrible. The weirdest thing is that it hit me every time every month two weeks before my cycle. PMS is enough alone, why depression too? I will never understand. The headaches, bloating, cramps, tender titts, and mood swing need I going on. It’s not the best party. It illiterately sucks all the energy out of me and I can’t function. I can’t believe how sad I’ve been lately. I try so hard to stay happy and do my hobbies but it’s not enough.
Sometimes my depression only last one to two weeks but April it lasted three weeks. It is not far for it to just take over my body. I was completely fine enjoying my family and going on fun outings with my girlfriends. But depression has no reason it just take over. It makes me sad, lazy, my energy level is completely low, I get very frustrated and irritated over small things and I isolated myself from everybody.
Also, fine myself lying to people including my doctor to get out of doing things. My therapist doesn’t give me advice she just listen to me and when I’m depressed I don’t like to talk I just want to be quiet and watch TV anything to stay out of my head. My thoughts get very dark and disturbing. Sometimes I scare myself.
Depression is so terrifying and I don’t wish this on anybody. I feel like depression is like sitting in the dark with no life, sounds just u stuck in your own head and there is no escaping and add hallucinations. Horrible, right! I wonder, is prison like this?